Coming out in the DPSmocracy and something else other than upcoming LGBT pride.

Brace yourself, Sunday is coming. Lets hope it wont be remembered as the bloody Sunday. Tomorrow, for the first time, LGBT Pride Parade is about to take place in Podgorica – capital of Montenegro. You know - that cute, small country in the Balkans – South East of Europe.

What else is new globally? USA government shutdown , then it brought (sexy) back. The rest of the world cared more about their national things, Nobel Prize for peace was not given to Malala and Montenegro received report from Brussels on (non)progress we achieved in the process of joining EU.

Recently, all the media are full on various reports o LGBT pride, judgments, calls for quitting – like they did it in Serbia too. This is the time when our biggest test is coming – are we ready to  accept that someone is different than us and has right to be different ?

Montenegro. Country of democracy. Country on its way to join  European Union. Give me a break please. This is what democracy looks like:

1.       Same party has been governing (and pretty much same people) for last 20 years.

2.       Corruption in every social sphere and nepotism are two main issues in the country.

3.       Minorities, women and children of ordinary people (the mortals or the muggles) are being discriminated or face difficulties in every day situations

4.       Church is everywhere in the country and our “religious and spiritual leaders” call on hatred speeches , politics and business rather than focusing on ideas and spirit of true Christianity

5.       Montenegro supported possibility of military attack on Syria. Please forgive us!

6.       At the same time, we showed incapability to deal with our own issues and have been selling the best of our country to foreigners

7.       Do I even have to say how to voting system goes in here? Pure democracy

8.       Public administration and bureaucracy are in complete control of big number of state affairs, completely corrupted and lets be  honest – completely incapable of getting anything done

9.       Human rights respect, sexuality, women rights, freedom of the media – taboo.

10.   So much progress on paper, misery in real life.

Don’t worry, this democracy isn’t so bad. The country gets better and gets a lot of pinky promises before the election. I think they should be held every month, for the sake of citizens.

So, upcoming pride parade is way too mainstream now – people telling jokes, pejorative calling of LGBT population can be heard every day, curses, preparation for violence or support for the group… I am not going to discuss further on this, because in this country , being gay, being different  is abnormal. Good thing is we all have an opinion on this , but no one has opinion on 10 sad facts I mentioned before.

If you feel annoyed by people not reacting and being cool with the country`s sink, or say that in public – everyone consider you a SERB and a state enemy. NO. I am just a citizen who thinks with its own head, says its opinion, is not afraid to come out as responsible citizen and say – THIS COUNTRY NEEDS TO GET ITS SHIT TOGETHER, OR ALL OF US ARE GOING DOWN.

Yet, people care about more about parade and who is going to come out from the closet on Sunday. I say yes to the walk, because I don’t think any minority group should live in the closet, afraid and discriminated. This blog goes to all those cowards, closed minded people, hiding behind their parents, teachers, bosses back and afraid to come out and do something good for their own country.

I see all those barbarians and violence coming tomorrow. All the negative feedback on LGBT pride. Well, why don’t you just come out of your own closet, my dear citizens? Why don’t you accept that someone has right to be different and let them be?

Its easy to hate and curse, and hide behind the politics , church, mom and dad, anyone. This is the problem with this society – we judge those who came out as who they are and what they feel, and yet most of us are not able. Not able to say no to corruption, discrimination, nepotism, grey economy, DPSmocracy we live in here, nepotism, etc… And it makes me sad and angry.

John F. Kennedy once said – Ask yourself what can you do for your country, not only what your country does for you. Imagine, like John Lenon once sang – its easy if you try – if every citizen did something good for Montenegro, and its progress. Not judging others and looking at welfare for all.

I hope one day we will have a parade when all of us will come out as active citizens of Montenegro and EU. Till then, I say yes to those who had courage, for all those having opinion and mouth open but doing nothing and staying closed-minded… I feel sorry for you. May the force be with us, who are not cowards, poltroons, etc.. who are not afraid and who think.

I have a dream that one day, this country will be a true example of human rights respect, social progress and democracy. We have the potential in  us, it just needs to get out of the closet and not be afraid. We shouldn’t be afraid of the government, government – since not doing a good job should be afraid of the citizens. Looking forward to the change, if it ever happens. In the meantime, peace y`all !

Gender issues as taboo topic in Montenegro, and why advocating for that is like a Star Wars. Education and equality as a requirement to join EU family and some statics on discrimination.

Montenegro is currently on its way to Europe. All roads that we are on right now lead to Brussels, if we close successfully all negotiation chapters. If you turn on the TV or the news, you can hear about some amazing process we are achieving in becoming a member of European family.

Yet, if you take a walk around ministries, or streets, sit in a cafee or something, all you will hear is people COMPLAIN. Low income, corruption, nepotism, environmental issues - chapter by chapter what we need to do.

Country duty in the process is to engage a lot of money and human resources in the process. But a lot of people, instead being educated to be quality human resources just sit around and wait for EU to come, raise salaries and fix everything. Sometimes I wish our ministries and institutions were cool like Ministry of Magic in Harry Potter. And then I say to myself – I am just a muggle.

Aside all 50 shades of grey things we have in the society, gender equality is the darkest shade. I wonder how that is constantly being skipped and avoided, and on the other hand – advocated in a completely wrong way. As everything in this country, government has a super plan how to implement gender equality through institutions. When you ask them , they are like “Oh, yeah – we are totally advocating and doing all measures to reach equality” Why then women are discriminated in every area in this society? Here are some facts.

1. There are no official education on gender and equality in any school segment, and Universities in Montenegro have no department or offer no classes on gender, power and politcs. (Let me remind you that gender studies are amongst prosperous social science areas).
2. Illiteracy in the country is higher with women – especially in rural areas. (#SmashThePatriarchy)
3. Women in sport, disregarding their success, are not equal with men.
4. Huge discrimination of women on labor market. (Laws on labor are not being properly applied)
5. Women are more unemployed than men.
6. During job interviews women face sexism, comments and judging on their looks, marital and family status, which is not a case for men.
7. Men hold more leading social position than men.
8. There is a lack of women in political life and women as political leaders.
9. Health system is sensitive to gender discrimination – (from general checking to aborting issues)
10. VIOLENCE on WOMEN. Taboo topic in the country. Violence in family, physical, mental, sexual, etc – we all know it exists, and we all ignore it. For example – 85% of people will report noise in the building from party, but less than 12% will report domestic and violence on women.
11. Women do not participate equally in decision making processes in the country with men

If you compare the data, you notice one thing – it gets worse as you go north. Just like in Game of Thrones, winter is coming in the field of gender equality – many girls don’t even get secondary education. Also, there are no proper institutions to inform women and men on their rights, on equality, no school education. Nor did any governmental institution did any successful reform in the system.

Its really cool, as my professor said. But people must fight this. Both women and men should be included in the process of integration, education and fight for gender equality, education and empowerment of the girls and women. Beyonce said it and I agree – girls do run the world. Women are capable of running a family and business and a country at the same time.

Ofc, it is a star wars situation with this – war against discrimination. And I don’t think EU will play Jedi knights or master Yoda in the story – its up to us to do it.

If not, guess we can join all the Stan company countries (Pakistan, Kyrgystan, Kazakhstan..) and face the darkest of fifty shades of grey. I am not calling for women domination or radical feminism, but desperate times like this require desperate measures. We must fight, advocate and implement equality to some level. If we ever change political figures, we may hope for woman president… Or just for better living standard.

Let the equality fights begin. And may the odds be ever in your favor.

Times are hard for dreamers. How to crush 50 shades of grey economy and bad social well-fare. Why is important to volunteer and how they do it in UK/USA.

Last month I attended a seminar in Worcester, England, on the topic of personal development, employability and non formal learning and how it can improve and influence social welfare. Of course, there was a clear division with the perspective and of the participants from Balkan countries and EU people, but I discovered that a lot of EU countries face the same problems and attitudes toward the topic.

TIMES ARE HARD FOR DREAMERS. This quote comes from one of my favorite movies, Amelie and is a very true statement. I am a dreamer with a lot of wishes, plans and ambitions not just for myself, but also for my country and also for this world. I believe we should all give our contribution to make this world a better place, and like a Miss Universe or something I want peace in the world and many things to get better. We might not reach perfection, but by gathering positive thinkers and starting some action we can prove the hope in and for humanity should not be lost J

What I encountered in England was a great culture of kind people, Beatles, beer, Harry Potter, royal baby, royal family, rainy days, green countryside and dull food. London was brilliant and I think “Please mind the gap between the train and the platform” got stuck in my head for 3-4 days. On seminar and in practice I learned a bit about education, economy and social state in the country and about community service standards. I was able to compare and contrast it to my living in the Balkans and United States. In UK it’s a standard to volunteer and help out in your community, in numerous ways. It is not just as a addition to CV, or college application but it’s a culture, non formal rule. All people do it, despite age and gender, when they have time – on weekdays and weekends. They enjoy it. Talking to local people in Worcester I saw how they see volunteering as a personal development and learning process, not just charity – because they get new skills, knowledge and experiences. That’s the point – not only do we enrich ourselves by volunteering , but we help our community, society and the world.

Community service in the United States is also well developed – students do it a lot and so do adults – they cherish non-profit world, build networks and strengthen their CVs and application.

Community service also allows those participating to reflect on the difference they are making in society. Some participants of a community service project may find themselves gaining a greater understanding of their roles in the community, as well as the impact of their contributions towards those in need of service. Because community service outlets vary, those who serve are exposed to many different kinds of people, environments, and situations. 

With each new community service project, some participants may gain insightful experience in a variety of areas. Participants may also internalize the information that they found personally insightful for future use. While simply performing community service is valuable to the recipients, those serving often find it beneficial to pause and reflect on how they are changing society for the better. Schools often take students on community service projects in order for them to gain a greater understanding of how their individual actions affect the well being of the public. Participants may find that the giving of themselves to the public good may result in a more solidified view of self and purpose. 

And then you come back to the Balkans, where often you are unaware how to volunteer and made laugh by the others for doing free work. ITS NOT ABOUT THE MONEY, MONEY, MONEY… And its not only Balkans problem.  I understand how different socio economics conditions took away volunteering possibilities for many people – working full time, trying to get by, support a family etc.. But I also believe a big education should be done in this field, especially for all those unemployed people, drinking coffee all day , every day in various coffee shops around the Balkans and wider. Young and old folks should learn all the ways to volunteer, why it is beneficial and how it helps, also how much do they gain from it. During college, we are required to get some skills and experience. Today, accent is often on the non formal learning and what we actually did as socially responsible individuals or young leaders, not only do we have a degree and from what school. People justify themselves how they don’t have time to do community service in the Balkans, because there is no money/time/results. But you have money, time and results in drinking coffee and playing gossip girls and boys all day, every day ?! GIVE ME A BREAK. All it takes to do good is a smile, positive energy, very little time and initiative and a lot of hope and courage. All over Europe people will consider you a fool if you work for free. Well, I say only those fools will be able to break 50 shades of grey economy and lead to changes and progress. Just look at this – Big depression and First Big Global economic crisis in the USA was beaten by volunteering. Also, Balkan people were world example – THEY BUILT AN ENTIRE COUNTRY AFTER THE WAR , WORKING TOGETHER AND VOLUNTEERING TOGETHER . So , if history repeats, why didn’t someone tried to copy Roosevelt`s New Deal, adjust it and find a way out of this crisis we live in ?

Main purpose of the story is confirmation of what I learned in the USA and UK – it is not about how much money you make, what school did you go to in CV or  in real life. It is about how much you are ready to give and work and to expect in return, and what do you believe in and how much you can improve through non formal seminars, trainings, community work, etc.. World did it several times, it just takes another perspective and motivation to happen again.

I volunteered from elementary school- collected donations, cleaned, collected garbage, tutored, protested and did so many actions and will keep doing so, no matter what people say. Maybe I cannot change the world, but I can affect progress in someone`s life, create an example and make someone happy and smile. And then I think to myself, what a wonderful world. J

This is just my perspective and I truly hope it will inspire someone. As Mother Teresa said, “we ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.”

MEAN GIRLS goes from "You cant sit with us" to "You cant play with us, you dont have an Iphone" iliti moderna omladina i buducnost Crne Gore

I wasn’t planning to write a new blog so soon, but when inspiration comes, you just don’t question yourself.  And I am ready for new wave of hating I got from my last blog. It is quite normal when you write about the things that are wrong in our society.  Unlike the previous one, where certain people stated that if you have more money, its fine to be selfish, materialist,  buy the most expensive (not stylish or not fitting) brands, doesn’t matter they fit you or not, but you have money, and its cool.

I get it, some people have money, capitalism creates inequality, etc.. Just like Madonna sang “we are living in a material world”.. But I am NOT a material girl. Or simply to quote George Orwell , when he wrote in “Animal farm” –   “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.”

I am not going to track roots of inequality, give attitudes of philosophers and economists, such a Carl Marx (or papa Carl, as I call him). Yup, one doesn’t need to read Das Capital and try to understand papa Carl, or generations of thinkers before and after him, to see that we are not equal. But, what I witnessed today was a sad scene, as a result of current (LONG LASTING) state of being in our society.
In neighborhood I live in, there are too elementary schools. So, last two days I walked by tones of exciting kids, that struck my memories of first days of school. What I saw disappointed me.

Kids these days bring Iphones to schools, instead of school equipment and gear. OBVIOUSLY BECAUSE THEY CAN.  Again, I understand world have changed, technology improved  and all of that. But is it ok that kid , 7 years old brings an Iphone to school, brags about it, take pictures and show cool application. Yes, too cool for school, obviously. And I don’t care what people say, that’s not ok. Because they are just enrolling in school system, and they should gain more knowledge, not killing their creativity and time with phones and gadgets. And for all of those hypocrites stating how its natural way , because kids today have more opportunities, I have something to say : This is Montenegro. Not Japan, or some super developed country when kids actually don’t use pens, they write, read and learn on their gadgets. Kids here …. Just take picture, usually duckfacing….  Yes, 10 year old , with a  duckface and a pose, I see you becoming  a leader/president one day.. Totally.

What hit me the most was the scene I witnessed, passing by my old elementary school.  3 fancy dressed girls were playing with their Iphones, and a shy cute girl came along asked can she play with them, and that they should play a game.  Mini “mean girls” followed by mini Regina, turned to her and said “YOU DON’T HAVE AN I PHONE… NOT COOL, YOU CANT PLAY WITH US”. Shy girl walked away in tears. SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE HECK?!! You are kids, you should play, enjoy being in school, because truth be told life of adults is not that cool.

I felt so sorry for that girl, so I came up to her and talked a little, tried to cheer her up. Yes, this world is not fair, but I cant stand how the state in this country is corrupting some of most precious things in life.  Also, 9 years old is a little bit too early to have ANY TYPE of phone  and to judge and molest others for not having it.

And then someone dares to say that’s the case of progressive kids of today. Excuse me, not to be rude – but where the heck is progress there? Back in those days, I went to music school, read and loved HP (still goes on today) and went out and played with my friends..Like hide and seek, and those games, not freaking Angry Birds .. Since I am obsessed with that game nowadays, guess I went progressive with time.  J

Teachers and people in education should deal with this more, because they are shaping the minds of people who one day will lead this country. Or we can just drop it. Papa Carl made a division in capitalism in two classes, today is modification : people with and without I phones. And sink even more.

But that just me saying some things.  No hard feelings, people. Adios, till the next blog :))

Time to get real about gender position and social things in Podgorica/Montenegro

Ever since I got back from USA, I catch myself often thinking -What is wrong with people in my hometown? How they can be happy with the mentality of standing in one place for more than 20 years? And if they are not happy, why they are not doing anything to make a change? I get it.. We, Montenegrins are very proud of our national history, getting independence etc. Yet, it is not good living in the past. We need to move forward. I see it way too often through Podgorica, just walking around or even talking to people, how they are not happy with current state of affairs, yet they don’t want to do anything. Just sit and complain. Complain how everything is mom`s fault, teacher`s fault, government`s fault, ultimately America is guilty.. That song is way too overplayed and still it is kind of evergreen – we all know it and repeat it day by day. The biggest excuse I hear from people is that this is small country and small town.. Monaco is small, and look where Monaco is (on the world map and social development map). One of the precious things I learnt in the USA is that your actions and aspiration can reach a goal and change something. And ever since I got back, I tried empowering people, shared my stories and experience, hoping to affect someone to join me and make something better. And everyone get enthusiastic, but when it comes to action they all stand aside and criticize. This is not small environment problem. It’s a first, second and third world problem for Montenegro.  I am used to getting a lot of hatred and conspiracy theories about my love for America. And what I want to say is that country has great examples of self initiative and value of community service. I believe that’s the model we should try applying here. And what Montenegro really needs is some serious gender and politics attention, and girls and women empowerment.

Its easy to complain how bad we are on social ladder. We could be Pakistan, Kazakhstan or any of the "stan company countries" that suffer poverty, war, lack of female inclusion and lack of natural and human resources. We have all the good things and advantages which we like to sell to mostly Russians, but to anyone who offers a good price. And where is women rights and national pride in all of that. Yes, we are ecological,beautiful country. But lets get real - Podgorica and Montenegro are full of hypocrisy , false representation , nepotism , cell phones and Chinese copies of various brands. Its time that someone , I mean all of us say ITS ENOUGH.

With all due respect to female NGO sector in Montenegro, we need serious empowerment and education of female members, not just performances that include foreign and domestic politics issues, goats, blood and similar stupidity. I mean, I can totally take a goat in government building, make a fool out of myself and cause NO POSITIVE change. Similar to Martin Luther King, I have a dream that my beautiful country and hometown will become a great, developed place, where young people can use their potentials and where there is some sort of future and opportunities. I want nepotism and corruption to be put to minimum. And I am ready to devote myself to that dream, but not to be taken for granted or just like MLK , to be shot, killed or something.

Starting from the family law of Montenegro, to every day situation girls and women lack legal protection, respect and recognition. But most of all they lack education, aspiration and empowerment. Shift from communism to democracy allowed negative impact such as materialization of everything, especially values, self confidence and way of thinking. What can you expect from one society where most of the girls only cares about how will they look, do they have Louis Vuiton , fancy make up, how to copy celebrity styles.. Walking around my hometown I see all sorts of Blair Waldorf wanna-be, Jelena-Karlesa wanna-be and its sad.. Why no one looks up to Ellenor Roosevelt, Indira Ghandi and bunch of other great exemples… And as long as outfit, I wish they heard Macklemore singing “50dollars for a T shirt, that’s just some ignorant sh*t”..  I know we all want to look well and live well, but golddigging and putting yourself way too much may help you get a rich husband, but if you raise kids to do the same way, its social decline for another 50years.

I am not suggesting some puritan Scarlet Letter methods, where girls should wear scarlet “A” for adultery and moral sins (I believe scarlet would be the trendiest color of the season in that case) but just calling for implementation of some morals, girls and women turning to how they behave, how to be lady like, how to get more knowledge and become more social activists, not just gossip, try to look like a celebrity and try to have hair and style like Rihanna, Katty Perry or something.

WHY DO WE NEED TO FIX THIS? Because it is just wrong to see females older than 40 trying to dress up and look like they are 20… Simply because they are not 20 anymore. Or girls who choose money over education, golddigging instead of hard working and empowerment and , picking guys just because of the cars, bank accounts , etc..

Or we can just leave things like they are, and see our lovely county sinks in Chinese copies of fashion brands, stupidity and girls falling on heels, trying to make a wrong impression. Indeed I have a dream that all of this will change.. But I am not ready to die to change this. Stupidity goes to infinity and beyond. And to all of fellows who agree with me and want to change something, I can only say : MAY THE FORCE BE WITH US. 

education - remembering the facts vs. problem solving and critical thinking

"Too often we give children answers to remember, rather than problems to solve".  
Education is the one of the most important processes in society, it enables progress and development to people and can rise the quality of living to a very high level. This fact is certain, yet not every type of education can serve the purpose. Education and the way knowledge is created and transferred varies from country to country , from society to society. One of the big issues with that is that too often education focuses on constant remembering of facts and their repetition. Not on development of creativity , critical thinking and problem-solving attitude. When you are child in school, sure you are eager for learning as much as possible. Yet, what you learn is supposed to prepare you for "real life" - one day, as an adult with a certain profession you will use what you learnt in school. But how can you do that, if only thing your learn in school is to repeat what your teacher says and remember what's in the textbook. That problem is followed by other great injustice- the grading system. Too often , children awarded with good grades and encouraged by teachers are exactly the ones who listen what is told and remember, but they don't think with their own heads - they don't learn to solve the problems. No matter how educational systems around the globe are diverse, this is something most of them have in common. Growing up, I was witnessing this problem. All that was important was remembering a lot of facts , and repeating teacher's words. If you dared to show your own understanding, often you would come across misunderstanding from the teachers. You would even be consider stupid , not creative. Yet, I tried not to get down too much. If the school didn't understand my way of thinking , which was more creative and deeper, I should find an alternative. So , I turned to reading. I remember Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, Wizard of Oz, Pipi LongSocking and all other characters being my idols from books- and example how they coped with problems, often without suggestions or help of the adults- only by themselves. Going to college in the USA last year was what I was waiting for. First time , I met teachers who inspired me to think creatively and critically, not to remember answers, but to ask questions, recognize problems and find strategies to solve them. I don't want people to get me wrong- I had teachers who were just like in my elementary school. And it's not that I am praising USA, but in their college system practical knowledge and asking questions , solving problems is much more common then where I come from. This fall, I am graduating, and will be seeking for Masters. After, I hope I will get a PhD and become a professor of International Relations. There is nothing more I want to do in life than teach others. But I want to bring change- I don't want to be only person talking. I want my future students to ask questions, examine and research, seek and solve problems. I believe by that , productive and useful knowledge is created. "Children have to be educated, but they also have to be left to educate themselves." In today's world, with all the technologies, information are wide spread, available to everyone and in every minute. So, there is no need for remembering and repeating the facts. It is more important to influence people to think big, recognize problems and learn how to deal with them in every-day life situation. We are leaving the world to young generations, so its our task to make sure they get quality education. Education applied to all the people, disregarding the gender or the age. Education that can lead to improvement. Problem solving should take away the spotlight to remembering the facts. That's what we should invest in. Because "investment in knowledge pays the best interest", just as B. Franklin said it. The future lies in our hands. In that situation, I call for Nelson Mandela and his words of wisdom- "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use the change the world." So, lets make it powerful, progressive and moving forward, not dull, boring and repetitive.

50 reasons why not to read 50 shades of gray

   

I remember that time last August, when I came to USA, and heard about its national best seller – 50 shades of grey trilogy. For those of you not informed, it had become a best seller, bigger than the Bible or Harry Potter. Which I think its UNACCEPTABLE. Why it was such a huge hit? Because it is an erotic, controversial book. Now, lets make this thing clear. I am not against this book because it is erotic, or whatever. I consider myself extremely open-minded person and someone who loves to read. First, I was judging this trilogy by its cover and reviews. Then I read it, and judged it even harder. I am not going to push it too far and say who is targeted by this book, I am keeping that humble opinion to myself. But I will push it far enough and say that you cannot read this book and say it’s a masterpiece. Or that you know contemporary literature, and only thing you have ever read is 50 Shades of grey and Cosmopolitan advices how to get over facebook break-up and make your hair look like Rihanna. Stopping hypocrisy right here

While all of you enjoy reading this trilogy, and all of you wondering should you read it or not, let me give you 50 reasons why not to read 50 shades of grey.

1) It started as Twilight fan fiction. Yes, really. For the record, this should never, ever be the inspiration for a book. “I ate a really good sandwich” would be better. Even “I was so moved by the collected works of the cast of The Jersey Shore I decided to put in it words” is more acceptable. “I read Twilight and wanted to make an erotic version of it” is not.
2) “Oh my” is a too cheesy and way to often mentioned in the book.
3) The author doesn’t know what “subconscious” means.
4) There are tones of better books to read.
5)  I don’t get it: is she is employee or his girlfriend?

-6)  If she was really smart, she’d have asked for stock.

-7) Explain to me how someone’s eyes can be “smoldering embers”. Without sounding stupid.
-8)  Apparently one book ends and the other  just starts and there’s no real transition between them.
-9) The female protagonist says “Holy cow!” 84 times throughout the trilogy. Which, you know, is an expression 20-somethings often use. (Also, this Amazon review has compiled other phrases that are overused in the book. It is delightful.)
-10)  I bet not even this Christian Grey fellow can get into the secret room above Tavern Law.
- 11) I have to do laundry.
- 12) I’m worried it will make me regret being literate.
- 13) No self-respecting tech mogul in Seattle would buy a woman an Apple computer.
- 14) On that note, why is she a college student without a computer? How does that even happen?
-15) Stupid stories stay with me far longer than good ones. I’m afraid that this book will haunt my dreams.
16) Because when you think about it, life is really short. Way to short for this book/
-17) Where do they find the time to have all this sex (and not-sex)? It’s been my personal

belief that entrepreneurs are really busy.
-18) I’m really, really sick of female protagonists who are virgins, waiting to give it up to the perfect guy. Way to cheesy.

19) The book actually aspires submission of women. Its like… HELLO, where is feminism?

20)Someone’s mouth cannot “quirk up”. That is not a thing.
-21) I don’t think loving a person means you should want to change them.
-22) Twilight-author Stephanie Meyer has refused to read it. And it’s not like that woman is a literary snob.
-23)Billionaires aren’t in their 20s. And if they are, they aren’t single. Or drop-dead gorgeous. Instead, they’re stressed-out and sleep-deprived and have terrible diets. Wait, was this fiction, or fantasy?
-24) It actually contains this line: “My inner goddess is doing the dance of the seven veils.” In the author’s defense, that is comedic gold. Unfortunately, the book is not supposed to be comedic.
-25) The book is set in both Seattle and Vancouver. The author has never been to Seattle. Or Vancouver.  What happened with the gold rule – write about something you actually know about? New rule: you have to visit this town at least once before setting a novel her
26) I’d be way more interested if he was the submissive. #NONOTACTUALLY
-27)  He says she can’t snack between meals? DEALBREAKER. You can't simultaneously love someone and tell them they can't have snacks.

28)  I cannot imagine his board of directors would be cool with any of his behavior.
29) Why does preferring a BDSM lifestyle automatically necessitate that you had to have a fucked-up childhood? Again, way to cheesy.
30) Game of Thrones is a way better book. Ask the entire world.

31)  I’m scared I might like it a little. Wait, no. Not really.

32) If you have nothing else the read think of the Harry Potter. Or Lord of the Rings. Or just watch movies.

33) If you actually want to read erotic novels, I am pretty sure you can find better ones.

34) This book is meant to desperate 40+ housewives with no sex life. #thereisaidit

35) RED ROOM OF PAIN. Enough said.

36) I could actually watch some cooking show and learn how to cook.

37) Women submission? No way.

38) Ellen DeGeneres hates the book. Do you even doubt Ellen?

39) Do not try at home anything written in the book :D
40) Judge it by the covers and dont buy it.- 

41) This book is not deep. Actually, that depends on the context.

42) Even if your passion lies with erotic literature, I am sure you can find way less cheesy one.

43) If you are feeling lonely, dont warm yourself with this book. Get a pet.

44) Go out. Take a walk. Exercise and stay fit.

45) Because readers deserve better. Even if they are 40+ no sex life housewives.

46) Because Seattle deserves better.

47) Because America deserves better.

48) Because the world and literature deserve better.
49)Because erotic fiction really deserves better.
50) Because if I really want a good love story about an adorably disheveled Seattle CEO and the absolute mess of a woman that he loves, I need look no further than my own life. You just need to swap out the whips and chains and ball gags and violent sex for cupcakes and cuddling on the couch. Long live the romance and Jane Austen. 

Reverse cultural shock: Story of bringing sexy back, le me like Bilbo Baggins, Macklemore, Montenegro living and a bit more :)

This is a reflection on my life in previous month and my try to bring (sexy) back in Podgorica-Montenegro-Europe after a year at American University in Washington DC.

Meanwhile, my life suffered some significant changes.Last August, I arrived in the USA, with a lot of hopes, plans and dreams. It seemed that year will last forever. I was still missing my family and friends, but also was ready for all the future challenges.

The term culture shock is often used flippantly when talking about cultural differences and how we deal with them. It is often overlooked that culture shock is more than the source of funny anecdotes arising from cultural peculiarities or misunderstandings

Culture shock is in fact a serious phenomenon and a long-winded process, and thus definitely a force to be reckoned with when moving abroad. Depending on personality and circumstances, some people might find it easier to deal with culture shock than others. In its milder forms, culture shock can even go by virtually unnoticed. As an expat, however, you are unlikely to escape culture shock completely. The effects of culture shocks can be severe, and in some cases they are even are responsible for expat assignments being terminated prematurely. Fortunately, it is possible to prepare yourself for the culture shock phenomenon in its various stages so that it doesn’t hit you unexpectedly.

Is it even necessary to say that I had time of my life discovering all the pros and cons of USA, and how actually bizarre America was. Living in the capital- Washington DC, and traveling through 24 states, with all adventures, friends and experienced gained enriched me for life. Coming from Montenegro , small country in the Balkans  (ITS IN EUROPE for those who still don’t know) everything seemed magical. I had opportunity to see bright and poor side of America, which changed and shaped the way I think now.

After that great and long year of my “Americanization” (which btw was really successfully pulled off) I was supposed to pack and leave home. Easy thing. Sure. At least it seemed to be. I was indeed truly happy to come home, but also sad to remind myself I will not be back for a while. Saying bye to all of my friends, and to DC was not easy. Remember that "I am bringing sexy back" ? Well, sexy back could only be in a song, in real life things are quite different.

Packing was adventure itself; I discovered my new life skill was jumping on suitcase and crying after things I had to throw away. Later, things got real at the airport, where as usual I was faced with real life and laws- which did not agree with me on how much and what can I bring back. New life skills were re-packing on the airport, cursing airport workers slightly in my native language when they charged me, and leaving more things in USA.

On airplane from Munich to Belgrade, guy sitting in front of me was rocking some Balkan classics – Ceca, Dragana Mirkovic, Mile Kitic, etc.. After a year , I heard Balkan call of the wild. Still, coming back to Podgorica, my beautiful , small home town and capital of Montenegro was definitely what people call reverse cultural shock.

I remember the time when US people , when I would tell them I am from Montenegro, would show confused face and said : “Africa? Asia? Is it an island in the middle of the ocean?” Well, I came back. My building had some technical issues – we were short for Wi Fi, water and electricity. It did feel like I was in Africa, living first world problems.

Coming back, all of my family and friends were excited at first. Then they got back to their ordinary lives, telling me how they got used to me not physically being there. My friends still have exams, and I am done with all of them. I came like Bilbo Baggins, full of adventures and stories… and just like that poor hobbit, I got that “Oh you poor Bilbo” when telling my adventures. People asked me all the time about stereotypes,  and I spent time trying to explain that college life is not like in “American pie” and that America is not that bad, and people have to work really hard.

 Jetlag was the worst, it took me several days till I got back to normal sleep. I am still getting used to my favorite, most loved Montenegrin food. After a year of eating at my school, and in TDR and Tavern, sad thing is that I got completely used to the food. And instead eating wonderful food at home I was suffering for chicken tenders and similar stuff. Yup, by now everything is fine, love for good food is bigger than any reverse cultural shock.

Going out and walking out in Podgorica I realized some sad life facts:

• No metro in Montenegro.
• We are too small.
• No Starbucks.
• No dancing in the clubs and bars – you just go and sit all night long and its freaking annoying
• No Pandora. No Spotify. No Netflix. No Hulu.
• No on-line shopping
• School system and social life are really different.

Also, I was used to listening all that American music. All that Beyonce, Nicki Minaj, rep music.. basically everything.. Playing beer pong and laugh at people who grind and twerk. And a lot of people here didn’t even know for someone like Macklemore. What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?

Yes, and I still didn’t have a chance to say all of the stories, because I think no one will listen to my endless talk about American University, college life, dorms, parties, internship, DC, all the journeys.. Just like poor Bilbo Baggins.

Now, I laugh at myself, and how first days of come back I used to smile to all the people, be really kind, which in my city is considered unusual or non-existing , say “thank you” “hi how are you” and “sorry” all the time. I got judged all the time. And I was in a place where everything is about being judged how do you look and what do you think. Unlike in USA, where everything is about being busy and getting things done, here it was chilling, getting nothing done, but gossiping and judging all day, every day.

Eventually, things got back to normal. I live in a country that sometimes seems like a hopeless place economically, and it is facing a lot of challenges. Yet, its beautiful, unique and I am glad I am back. With all the energy and ideas, I am aspired to do some new things here, improve my life, and try to change at least something here, and make it positive. And if it doesn’t work? I will just go back to USA. This time, with no shocks of any kind. At all.

True fact is that there is no place like home. Even if everyone here are different, its still my home. Place were people drink, go out and dance with folk music, still not knowing about Macklemore, thrift shopping, Starbucks frappucinos, what is wobbling or dougie dance. Where you will be looked down at for not having branded clothes. Where a lot of people still don’t recognize email as way of communication. But it’s a place where your family is, where you can hang out with your friends, and with a drink or two in hand and with great food you can laugh and joke about everything. With beautiful and stunning nature , it’s a little heaven on Earth. Mission is trying to enhance the pros, and decrease the cons of living in Montenegro. Since it can get any worse, I want to try to make it better. People deserve it. And this beautiful country does too. So, as I am finishing this blog and eating REAL fruit, reminding myself how funny everything seemed, some guy living above me is rocking with Nedeljko Bajic Baja. In other words, it does says welcome back. I am home.

The truth of the matter is that nothing has changed, except me. Allowing yourself to be fully immersed in a completely alternate culture, ingratiating yourself to people of an entirely different background and welcoming their ideals and aspirations into your heart will leave you profoundly altered, irrevocably changed and hopefully thrilled by your evolution as an active worldly citizen of this beautiful planet. In the end, I can I say I brought a sexy back. Yeah. #notactually
Farewell, y`all till my next blog post.

HELP OUR WORKERS GET REHIRED (or how I suddenly turned into such a leftist)

When I first came to American University, I must say I was not delighted by the food I found in TDR. (Terrace-Dining-Room, place where students eat.) Salsa and Tavern were not that great either. It took me a while to get over my cultural shock with the food and realize that not all American food is what we get on campus. Also, after a while I started loving TDR (especially when they put out Nutella) and Tavern (tenders!!). And I made friends with the workers, who first started teasing me about my English accent. Soon enough they all knew me really well, they knew my struggles to getting used to the food, and they did all they could to make my staying at AU more pleasant. For example, when making my food they would all pay attention to spices, stuff they put in, so I can really have a nice abroad experience – completed with food.

Coming to TDR, they would always greet me with my smile, asking how I am and how is my day. Workers would always chat with me, listen to my abroad adventures, make jokes, etc.. I also witnessed not so great treatment of workers by students- some of them definitely lacked some home education by trashing everywhere, and being completely disrespectful to the workers.. But that’s another story. Just because they work there doesn’t mean we should treat them inappropriately.

As the end of the year is coming by, I realized TDR is not going to be the same next year. Bon Appetit is not going to be there anymore. Tavern and Salsa, Eagle express , Einstein Bagels and Pronto will be gone. Replaced with Starbucks and other corporations. Well, in my point of view seems like AU will never be the same without TDR , tenders .. and the workers of Bon Appetit. Yes. New company is here. Aramark recently took over for Bon Appetit as the campus food service company. They now refuse to acknowledge the worker’s union contract and are threatening to not rehire our workers. This is not acceptable. If Aramark wants to stay on campus, they need to learn that here at AU we respect our workers.

Several student organizations already have a history of fighting for TDR workers. I mean, if they were not good , we wouldn’t care, and we would let them be rehired. But we have great workers at AU, who make our food, who serve the AU with pride- who come to work every day no matter is it snowy, sunny or rainy outside. They love their jobs. They deserve respect. AND TO BE REHIRED.

Today , group of students (among which I was present) together with some workers marched through MGC with posters and visited campus life office. Administration was cold as always, justifying that everyone are “busy” “at the meeting” “can’t come right now”.. If I learnt anything about this culture- it is certainly that everyone are busy. Or they pretend to be. Students are in the middle of finals week. Still we fight for workers who deserve so. I really hope Aramark will rehire and renew all the contracts of people. They deserved it, working for AU for so long. So, I want to invite all of the students to join the action and help workers. Because if we don’t care about our school , who will ? Administration and leaders will always be “at the meeting”.. But that’s another (cultural) story..

CROSS CULTURAL COMMUNICATION: story about cultural difference, geography, food in classes and being a cultural ambassador:)

“We have become not a melting pot but a beautiful mosaic. Different people, different beliefs, different yearnings, different hopes, different dreams.”

                                                                                                          Jimmy Carter

Coming to United States for an academic exchange from a completely different culture was not an easy transition. When I reflect upon it right now, it doesn’t seem that hard- since I was little I was exposed to Western culture, and I learned quite quickly the American way of living. American University and DC generally, is definitely really diverse place, but travelling across country I was able to encounter with some typical stereotypes in this culture. When people ask me what hav I been doing all year long I tend to make a joke “trying to convince people that I am not from Africa”. Geographical ignorance is wide spread. And I see that as a result of different educational systems. When I would say to the people that I am from Montenegro, I would get questions “Is that in Africa? Asia? Latin America?” Sometimes, conversation would go to too far way and even I would get question about Europe being a country, etc.. I am not judging anyone, and I understand geography is not everyone`s concern. But as long as you know 7 continents we can start from somewhere J

It is really interesting to compare educational systems in this context. In the biggest part of Europe schools are not privatized, when it comes to elementary education. Not as nearly as in the USA, where public school work quite differently. I went to public school for 12 years, and I think I got a great education- 3 foreign language classes, math, chemistry, literature, physics, history and geography, etc.. Year after year. We are forced to learn facts about every worlds region- yet you come to “the greatest country in the world” and find people who don’t even know about their own country.. But again, I AM NOT JUDGING. Ignorant people are everywhere.

Still, I really like American educational system. First of all- YOU CAN EAT IN THE CLASSROOM!  You can bring food and drinks. People bring it, teachers make food and we share. That was dream coming true for me, biggest food lover in the world. During my education in Montenegro I was always penalized for eating in class, or even kicked out for just bringing food. Here it is different. And I love it. Other awesome thing about this educational system is that encourages people to speak in class. Which often was not the case, and it is still not today. Classes are based on discussion, whereas in the traditional school system- you sit, listen, write down notes and memorize everything. I also love the fact that college life offers a lot of engagement throughout clubs, internships, student organizations, etc.. It is not perfect system. But it gives you a lot in practice. Not just endless theory, which was my education back home. I love being in class, discussing and listening to different perspectives. Sometimes I was looked down at, because I am international (“If you are from Europe, how can you speak American?”) In one of my classes, at the beginning of the year, I asked “Does anyone has a rubber?”, and got the weirdest looks ever.. Learnt quickly couple more differences between British and American English. I also learnt the time is money is this country, and people are just always too busy, or at least they pretend to be. Do I even have to mention that no one cares when they ask how are you?

Interacting with Americans and creating friendships was a quite easy for me, because I appear to be really friendly and outgoing. And I used an opportunity with my floormates, classmates, teachers, people I worked with and that I met to be a true cultural ambassador. Studying abroad is not just about learning about different culture(s). It is about presenting your own, breaking the stereotypes.. Teaching people that Montenegro is not in Africa, that story of Yugoslavia is so much more than the bombings in the 90s.. Talking about the dance, food, tourism , Eurovision- all of my floormates know a bunch of cheezy and catchy Euro songs by now J

And after all this, all the cultural effort and my good adaptation to American culture I still get questions like “OMG, you know for Justin Timberlake?” “You`ve seen Mean Girls?” “It is so cool  and unbelievable you watched Power Poof Girls when you were a kid!” Makes me laugh every single time.. Guess cultural learning and teaching never ends!:

Overall ,this whole cultural and academic exchange was quite awesome. And I think I took most of it. It was great being a part of this melting pot. 

Poverty in USA, structural inequalities; gangs in L.A. and incarceration issue.

“Economic policymakers, as well as the media, often convey the impression that the poor passively accept their economic circumstances, or are in poverty because they somehow lack initiative.  Missing from these conceptions is the consideration of how the poor and unemployed adapt by tapping into the informal or underground economy and surviving on income that never appears in any government accounts.”

                                                                                                                                    Robbins, 175

“…a focus on structures often obscures the fact that humans are active agents of their own history, rather than passive victims.  Ethnographic method allows the “pawns” of larger structural forces to emerge as real human beings who shape their own futures.”

                                                                                                                                     Bourgois, 17

"America's much-ballyhood liberty is largely fictional. Three million of
us are [in prisons or on parole]...The rest of us are captives of
credit, our jobs, our need for health insurance, or our ceaseless quest
for a decent retirement fund."

Joe Bageant—Deer Hunting with Jesus

Story of poverty and culture in America is connected with existing of specific agency in this

country. Part of that agency is misconception of poor people themselves, especially the reasons that got them to poverty. Keynesian economy- (also known as “American capitalism”) teaches us that competitive and free market is the only way of success  and you can either be in two groups- the one who is making profit based on that market.. or the one who is not. Poor people are considered to be poor for various reasons. General public opinion , within  the opinion of policymakers is that you cant be poor if you are able to work. But inside that opinion, agency and social structures are doing their own deeds. American economy at this point is all about solving unemployment , creating more jobs, etc.. So, why people believe that poor people are passive about their economical and cultural condition, when there are jobs opportunities everywhere? Keynesian market offers possibility to everyone. But does it really?

Maybe because you need an education for good job, and poor people cant afford it. So they settle for minimum paid jobs, or low wage jobs, often taking several of them so they can pay for housing, food and basic necessities. Its not that they lack initiative- they go along with the system , so they can survive. And what pushes them into the battlefield is an example of cultural agency – “stories we tell ourselves about ourselves.” They do everything they can to survive. Yet, to the policymakers they are often invisible. Statistics had shown serious misconception about poverty and (non)existing of the middle class in the American society.

At a time when Republicans on Capitol Hill are expressing outrage for bad politics created by democrats -something more deserving of outrage is taking place: tens of millions of the nation's most vulnerable are taking hits on all sides. The nation's poverty rate is frozen at a high of 15 percent. And lawmakers on both sides of the aisle, for the most part, aren't even talking about it.

"Missing in action," Rep. Marcia Fudge (D-Ohio), the chairwoman of the Congressional Black Caucus, said of Congress' record on poverty. It has been a topic of discussion among Washington lawmakers in fleeting moments. Language about making poverty a national priority found its way into the Democratic Party platform last year and into President Barack Obama's State of the Union address in February. Democrats tucked a line into their budget proposals this year calling for a strategy to cut poverty in half in 10 years. Yet the issue has all but disappeared from the legislative agenda in Congress as lawmakers focus squarely on deficit reduction. Obama, too, has been largely silent on the issue, and has even proposed cutting Social Security -- a key tool for combating poverty. Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.), a leading voice for the poor in the Senate, has fumed that Obama is caving to Republicans on the issue at the expense of "millions of working people, seniors, disabled veterans, those who have lost a loved one in combat, and women." The statistics are staggering. According to the Census Bureau, the nation's poverty rate is at its highest level in decades. More than 46 million people -- one in seven Americans -- are living below the poverty line, 16.4 million of them children. Another 30 million Americans are just a lost job or serious illness away from joining them. And in the last six years alone, more than 20 million people have joined the ranks of those relying on food stamps to get by.

Meanwhile, the rich are only getting richer. Income inequality in the United States is greater now than at any time since 1929. It has gotten so severe that, according to a report by the nonpartisan Economic Policy Institute, low-earning workers in the United States are actually worse off than low-earning workers in all but seven similarly developed countries.

Given these figures, it is "unfathomable" that poverty is not "at the top of everybody's priority list,".

Many economists agree that the most effective thing Congress has done for poor people in recent years was passing the stimulus package in 2009. It was one of the first bills Obama signed into law as president, and it included substantial benefits for the poor, including an expansion of the child tax credit and new funds for child care, job training and the Temporary Assistance for Needy Families program, the nation's principal welfare program.

The package is credited with saving or creating 2.5 million jobs, growing the economy by up to 3.8 percent and keeping the unemployment rate from hitting 12 percent. As bad as things are now, they could have been much worse, economists say.

Still, does that really solve the nations problem? Lets look at some other problems.

Given the subpar unemployment rate -- it's been hovering just below 8 percent for months -- and the worsening conditions for the poor, some say the obvious response from Congress should be another stimulus.

   Why people cant change this? And why passing couple of bills doesn’t improve the state of well being in America? Because capitalism created structural inequalities and not just in the terms of income. It  divides people on racial, gender and ethnical origin, creating the phenomenon of “rich white Americans” and everyone else.

 As a classical example of structural inequalities strongly encouraged racially by policy makers we can look at Los Angeles. L.A. used to be great , prosperous , industrial place. Today it is certainly most attractive to tourists. But if you get lost from shining lights of Beverly Hills, and by any accident you end up in south L.A. , bloody and sad reality waits for you.  “A gang is an interstitial group, originally formed spontaneously, and then integrated through conflict. It is characterized by the following types of behavior: meeting face to face, milling, movement through space as a unit, conflict, and planning. The result of this collective behavior is the development of tradition, unreflective internal structure, esprit de corps, solidarity, morale, group awareness, and attachment to a local territory" African-American gangs began to emerge in the Los Angeles area during the 1920's, which was in concordance with the large black population in the city. The gangs in existence at this particular time in history were not territorial. On the other hand, they were "loose associations, unorganized, and rarely violent" Moreover, they did not employ monikers, graffiti, or various other gang characteristics to identify themselves. Gangs of the 1920's and 1930's were composed mainly of family members and friends, and they were involved only in very limited criminal actions. In fact, the main purpose of these criminal activities was to transmit a " 'tough guy' image and to provide an easy means of obtaining money.”  During the early 1970's, several other African-American gangs emerged in an effort to protect themselves from the many Crip gangs forming in the area. One of the most well known of these particular gangs is the Bloods, which came to be one of the other most violent and unlawful African-American gangs in Los Angeles. The Bloods established themselves around the West Piru Street area in the Compton section of Los Angeles. Sylvester Scott and Vincent Owens were the founders of the Bloods, and this certain gang actually started out as the "Compton Pirus." The swift expansion of the Bloods was aided by a severe conflict between the "Compton Crips" and the "Compton Pirus ," in which the Pirus were greatly outnumbered and brutally crushed. This conflict brought several sets of the Pirus together, and the Pirus subsequently joined forces with the "Laurdes Park Hustlers" and the "LA Brims." During the latter half of the 1970's, the Crips and the Bloods began to divide into smaller sets, and as they disseminated throughout the Los Angeles area, they "began to claim certain neighborhoods as their territory. Their gang rivalry became vicious and bloody". The Bloods and the Crips were extremely territorial and quite ardent in protecting their neighborhood against invasion by one another as well as other rival gangs. Due to the large number of gang members occupying a relatively small area of Los Angeles, the gangs devised a method of identifying one another. This system of identification would allow gang members to avoid assaulting members of different sets who belonged to the same gang.. Prior to the 1980's, the Crips and the Bloods had limited active participation in narcotics trafficking. "However, by 1983, African-American Los Angeles gangs seized upon the availability of narcotics, particularly crack, as a means of income"  Many of the gang members who became involved in the buying and selling of narcotics came from the inner city areas where poverty and unemployment are a way of life. Gangsters could make anywhere from three hundred to five hundred dollars per day selling crack cocaine. Thus, the money involved was a main component which drew gangsters to this particular line of work. Crips and Bloods control crack cocaine distribution in many cities around the country. Members of these gangs will migrate to other cities, ascertain the narcotics demand in that city, identify the dealers in the city, and figure out the established operations for narcotic sales. Gang involvement in the drug market has led to an extraordinary amount of violence throughout certain cities due to the members fighting over "profitable narcotics trade"  So, as members of the Bloods and Crips migrate to various cities throughout the United States, they bring with th6m the sale of narcotics and the violence associated with it. Gang members often relocate to other cities based on established family ties within a particular city and the enticement of quick profits from the buying and selling of narcotics. The Crips and the Bloods "have migrated throughout the country and are seen in most states and their prison populations. There are literally hundreds of sets or individual gangs under the main Blood and Crip names"  Eastern coast-based gangs including People Nation and Folk Nation have become so well known that the Crips and the Bloods have formed allies with them. Bloods have formed an alliance with the People Nation, and the Crips have formed an alliance with the Folk Nation. The Crips and the Bloods began nearly thirty years ago in a small section of Los Angeles, and today, there are over thirty-three states and one hundred twenty-three cities which are occupied by Crips and Bloods gang members. New York City is one of the major cities in the U.S. engulfed with Crips and Bloods, and its prisons are the home for many of these gang members. And acceleration is a new problem itself.

The accelerating rate of incarceration over the past few decades is just as startling as the number of people jailed: in 1980, there were about two hundred and twenty people incarcerated for every hundred thousand Americans; by 2010, the number had more than tripled, to seven hundred and thirty-one. No other country even approaches that. In the past two decades, the money that states spend on prisons has risen at six times the rate of spending on higher education. Ours is, bottom to top, a “carceral state,” in the flat verdict of Conrad Black, the former conservative press lord and newly minted reformer, who right now finds himself imprisoned in Florida, thereby adding a new twist to an old joke: A conservative is a liberal who’s been mugged; a liberal is a conservative who’s been indicted; and a passionate prison reformer is a conservative who’s in one. The scale and the brutality of our prisons are the moral scandal of American life. Every day, at least fifty thousand men—a full house at Yankee Stadium—wake in solitary confinement, often in “supermax” prisons or prison wings, in which men are locked in small cells, where they see no one, cannot freely read and write, and are allowed out just once a day for an hour’s solo “exercise.” (Lock yourself in your bathroom and then imagine you have to stay there for the next ten years, and you will have some sense of the experience.) Prison rape is so endemic—more than seventy thousand prisoners are raped each year—that it is routinely held out as a threat, part of the punishment to be expected. The subject is standard fodder for comedy, and an uncoöperative suspect being threatened with rape in prison is now represented, every night on television, as an ordinary and rather lovable bit of policing. The normalization of prison rape—like eighteenth-century japery about watching men struggle as they die on the gallows—will surely strike our descendants as chillingly sadistic, incomprehensible on the part of people who thought themselves civilized. Though we avoid looking directly at prisons, they seep obliquely into our fashions and manners. Wealthy white teen-agers in baggy jeans and laceless shoes and multiple tattoos show, unconsciously, the reality of incarceration that acts as a hidden foundation for the country.

Reasons for this are many- racial structure stands behind everything. This country had opened its door for so many people, forgetting the one who belonged here, who were oppressed and who built this country. People have no choice – incarceration, crime and low wage jobs are a magical circle , and once you get in, you are trapped. And change will not come from one of the shinning posters that scream “CHANGE” “FORWARD” “AMERICA for JOBS”. It must come in peoples mind first- when we try to help and redeem ourselves for people being marginalized based on their gender and race. Or when America stops being huge on international issue, and maybe help the one who are really in need- poor people, homeless, black, immigrants.

Or find another Marx, or someone who will call for social revolution. Because desperate times like these, are calling for desperate measures.